Owning our story...

20 days since the last post...just like that. Today happened to be be one of those days that emotionally matched the weather around here...overcast...or as Henri and Graham call it, cloudy with a chance of meatballs. However, the end of the day always gives time for reflection and the outlook is sunny. I had a hand appointment today and it looks like surgery is in my imminent future. That was the overcast part of the day...then things fell into place. Our air conditioner was repaired just in time for this soupy night we have on hand...praise God!!! Henri, Graham and myself had a conversation about how dinosaurs are dead and that maybe they are now worms in today's world...who knew a toddler could be so insightful? This girl! Josh brought our favorite Indian food home and that was a bonus on many levels. So as I said, ended the day on some very high notes. We have a busy few weeks ahead of us. Josh will be away on business (because he always works so hard for our family) and immediately after that we will be headed to the 513 to celebrate the nuptuals of my college bestie Natalie and her groom to be! The boys are going to be ring bearers in their wedding and I just hemmed their tuxedo pants today. Can't wait to see those little nuggets all decked out...gonna be book of awesome adorable. We will also be celebrating Henri's 4th birthday. He has chosen a Thomas theme again, which makes momma and daddy's job super easy...we have Thomas covered on just about every front. I could ramble on about boring lists of the going's on at the Byrge house but tonight I read something that has sparked something deep in me...there are some embers smouldering here on this one and I wanted to share it. "Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we will ever do" Author unknown Thinking the immediate things like: I expect my husband to love me unconditionally, but I certainly can not lead him there by example if I don't love myself the same way. Owning..."owning"...owning..something about that sounds grown up, permanent, and serious..I don't know that I am ready for any of those? Brave...I am not sure I can name one thing that I have ever done in my whole life that was legitemately brave...I know brave people...I know of brave things that I have seen and that others have done...don't know that anything personal registers up there? Wow, there is some truth in that quote up there..seriously. Ok, now I am exhausted and I am just a few thoughts into this. Bottom line, I need to explore this a little bit (or a lot bit)...it would be nice if I could take a life sabbatical and do that, but for now I am going to have to fit it into the little nooks and crannies of my day that I can steal from and fill it there..... Goodnight, xoxo Mel

Meet Sarah

July is already here and in fact, the holiday is upon us. We are anxiously awaiting the arrival of papa and GG from Cincinnati tomorrow! The time seems to fly by when I work multiple days in a row and this past week was no different. Sunday was our only family day in 7 plus days and we all enjoyed the time with no agenda. It seemed like an ordinary day after church. We came home to have lunch and then we were going to put the boys down for their naps. That is when a 3 weeks string of events hit me like a MACK truck. Graham was standing at the bottom of the stairs turning the hall light on despite it being plenty light enough outside. He then hollered up the stairs, "I turned it on for you Sarah!". I had to pick up my jaw from the floor and as I fully realized what was happening. Just like that Graham was playing with his imaginary friend!!! Henri has never had one, and until now, I don't believe Graham has either. However, for three weeks now, during his play and talk I have heard him mention this Sarah. I am not even sure why, but I am super excited about this new development. Later in the day Sarah went to WalMart with us, played in the backyard and had dinner at our table. I am very excited to foster this little GEM and hope that is helps Graham create something special in his toddler-hood years. Bottom line: This stuff is straight from the book of awesome. Other Book of Awesome things from this past week: Fresh mowed lines in the front yard running horizontally Sticking it to Ameren with no air conditioning for the first 2 days of July (in St. Louis) Having the whole house clean before Mom and Dad arrive Watching a doe and her fawn play in our backyard this morning for over 15 minutes Signing up to push the boys in their first 5K race. Xoxo, Mel

2000

So for the non-medical professionals in our lives 2000 signifies 8 pm. In the Byrge household this signifies the most magical time of the day, CUDDLE TIME! Our day is always full of mundane activities...making breakfast, lunch, dinner and a litany of snacks throughout the day. Running errands, cleaning the house, mowing the lawn. There are bills payed and laundry done when the boys nap. Trips to the gym and miles are run...etc. etc. etc. All the things anyone who is reading this has, is, or will experience. So needless to say, by 2000 Josh and I are both exhausted. I recently was on the receiving end of some of the greatest advice I have ever been given by a very insightful friend (you know who you are ;) ). She explained to me what a gem is. We are not talking about the diamond in your engagement ring or the amethyst on your necklace or the pearl in your ear, people....we are talking about a Genuine Encounter Moment, or GEM for short. These are the little miracles in your day, the moments that take your breath away, the moments when you can see what really NEEDS your time, focus, and energy versus what WANTS your energy. This is all still new to me, but it is radically changing the way I raise my boys and how I navigate through my day. Gems are things like putting a dishrag down the very moment your baby tugs at your saddlebag and asks you to dance silly in the kitchen just because. A gem is letting several loads of laundry pile up so that you can take your babies to the pool...again...because you know it is purely joyful to them (even if it is 98 degrees and 80% humidity to get to the pool, travel to and from the pool, and clean up from going to the pool). Gems are hearing your 2 year old say to you completely unprovoked for the first time "momma, I love you to the moon and back". Henri is going to be 4, really in a few short weeks, and for the first time, I am truly learning to prioritize my kids when they have one-on-one time with me. It can be shameful to admit this or it can be liberating...today I CHOOSE liberating. I am learning to say to myself "Self, any single person that I know that may walk through my door right this second as I type this blog could give two shits about the fact that I should be exercising instead of blogging. They could care less that I have yet to clean the kitchen from dinner, I have 3 loads of laundry that need to be taken care of, I have a bathroom that is 5 days removed from a sponge and bathroom cleaner, and I have paperwork that needs to be filed. What any one of those people cares about is that I am happy as a wife, momma, and friend." Sounds like a super ridiculous pep talk, but I need it every.single.day. These gems are helping me on a daily basis refocus my energy. The only person that has expectations of me that are unrealistic is me...so I have to let it all hang out. I have to be all-in in this one life that I have to be momma and wife. In the words of Robert Plant, "I have been dazed and confused for so long it's not true". These unrealistic expectations have had me in a haze...it's time to clear the fog and move on. So what about that magical time. When 7pm roles around it is time for bath, vitamins, zyrtec, and story time...but when 2000 roles around, that is when the magic happens. That is when the Earth quits spinning, the wind stops blowing, the phone doesn't ring or otherwise signal the need for something else, and I have the GEM of my day....I rock two of the most beautiful babies God ever created and give them the sense of love and security they need and deserve. So whether it's with your kids, your nieces or nephew, your spouse or your friend...find a way to make a GEM and daily part of your life...it's revolutionary. xoxo Mel Two candid shots of our sweet little nuggets and a shot of sunset facing west up our street!

Long time lost..

It has been over a year since I updated this blog...and it' sad. I have recently stolen some inspiration from a dear friend (BFO) and I realize how much I need this blog. I need it as a creative outlet (despite not having a creative cell in my body). I need it so my family can have frequent updates on our boys. I need it simply as a few minutes a week to escape. Although some of this blog will be mundane and seem like the official recording of our life, it i s a life that I believe is extra-ordinary. So feel free to stick with us on the blog or not! Regardless, it will be an exercise in therapy for this busy momma of two beautiful babies. Since the last post both of the boys have had another birthday as have Josh and I. Graham began walking and graduated from physical therapy. Josh and I have crossed several items off our bucket list. We bought our dream house in Wildwood, became landlords (not a bucket list item!) ran a half marathon, became an aunt and uncle again, had the boys dedicated at church, and generally had a ton of growth as a family! This summer is in full force here and we are loving all the time outside. The boys went "camping" for the first time two weeks ago in the backyard. We are ready to make outdoorsmen of our little boys!! They loved it and Josh and I are confident they will love the trails. Today marked another fun fun activity. The boys got a season pass to our local pool and they were in love!!!! I suspect this momma will be spending a lot of time there (in shorts and a t shirt!) this summer. The boys also went fishing for the first time this past weekend and they are looking forward to getting all tuxed up for their Aunt Natalie's wedding in August. The next post will most certainly contain pictures with a better update. Live Mighty, Mel